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Welcome back back back again my dears! It has been a long time but I’m sneaking back right before we close out this year from hell with my Drag Race predictions. Where have I been? Like every hot gay, I’ve of course been romping about mask less and then filming poorly worded apologies for social media. Kidding- I’ve been consumed with remote teaching while I watch my cat systematically destroy my apartment. Pandemic responsibleness sure is thrilling.
Anyway, I have some fun end of year lists to share soon. In the meantime, a new year of course means a new season of Drag Race. Since Season 13 premieres January 1st, below are my last-minute spoiler-free predictions for the season. There’s been a short drought of Drag Race content since Drag Race Holland finished in November, but get ready: by the end of January, we’ll be in the full swings of Season 13 and Drag Race UK Season 2, with All Stars 6 and Drag Race Spain just around the corner. We will truly be starting the year with a quran-slay.
So, what do we know about season 13 so far? If you are like me, and like going into the season blind, we can still look at the plethora of preseason content that has been released for subtle clues. I have links above and below to all the meet the queens videos and the promos that have been released so far. There has also been a trailer and a first look clip of the first 10 minutes of the episode, which are at the end of the blog.
The big twist being flaunted in the promos is the six lip-syncs for your life in the premiere. Am I excited for that? No. Could I be pleasantly surprised? Sure. As the show enters its old age, I alternate between wishing they would stick to the basics and wishing they would spice things up. So, if the twist is fun and successful without being too detracting, I’m down. Time will tell.
Before we get to the goods, just for reference I have included a list of the queen’s Instagram followers counts (with links to their accounts). Keep in mind that though the queens with the largest numbers of followers tend to stick until the middle of the season, it is hardly impossible for one to go home early (just ask Dahlia Sin).
- Gottmik-238,000
- Kandy Muse-120,000
- Symone-106,000
- Utica Queen-80,000
- Joey Jay-75,000
- Rosè– 72,000
- Denali-63,000
- Olivia Lux-55,000
- Kahmora Hall-46,000
- Tina Burner-43,000
- Lala Ri-39,000
- Elliott with 2 Ts– 32,000
- Tamisha Iman-28,000
Without further ado, here are my way too early predictions. I look forward to tracking how wrong I am in the weeks to come. Enjoy my dears and may the best DRAG QUEEN (it took over 18 seasons but finally Drag Race is post-gender!) win!
13: Elliott with 2 Ts
She seems pleasant enough and has a nice retro sense of style. It’s obviously way too early to tell but she has neither the following online nor any signs of standout personality in the preseason content to make me think she’s in it for the long haul. I’m pegging her (sheesh, even without taking her to dinner first!) as our first sashay.
12. Tamisha Iman
It’s always exciting to have an older queen on the season, and Tamisha comes across as warm and lovely in her meet the queen’s video. She also mentions that she can’t do the flips and tricks she once could and has a very old-school drag style. I’d be disappointed if they let her go first, but I can imagine her going quite early. Hopefully its Liza Minelli lies, but I have her going 2nd.
11. Joey Jay
Joey seems so funny and has some great lines even in the first 10 minutes of episode 1. I like some of Joey’s looks, but she doesn’t seem to have the same level of polish as the Kandys and Symones of this season. Based on that, I have her as an entertaining early season casualty.
10. Kahmora Hall
I’m getting beautiful and bitchy from the previews, both of which I love on Drag Race. Like Tamisha, her style just isn’t coming across as modern in the previews, and she was barely mentioned in the impression or naughty/nice videos. I think she is our early season bitch, and if so, god bless her.
9. Tina Burner
A NYC legend who has been speculated for years as a queen who could be on the show, Tina’s time is finally here. She could do very well on Drag Race with successful outrageous and engaging humor. Maybe I’m just having Brita PTSD, but for some reason I see her not living up to the hype. For that reason, I have her in this spot.
8. Symone
This is one where I hope I am wrong, but based on Drag Race convention, we often have a a well-known pre-season favorite fall around this spot. Symone will undoubtedly bring some amazing fashion to the runway, but will she be successful in the comedy and performance challenges? I see her going in this midseason spot but being welcomed back for All Stars and other future opportunities.
7. Utica Queen
Quirky and fashionable, we can be sure of one thing: Utica definitely makes an impression. She is already one of the most followed queens on Instagram (with no itention to detract from Utica’s charm and talents, I do have to point out the well-established pattern of white queens getting more followers than those of color) and is mentioned often in both the naughty/nice and impressions video. I see Utica staying a long time but eventually petering out a la Max from season 7. Never change that hair Utica- even if the judges tell you to.
6. Lala Ri
I think Lala will last longer than many people are predicting. Though her fashion seems weaker than some of the other queen, she mentions being a strong performer in her meet the queens video and has a warm personality that comes across in all of the preseason content. She’s my bet to surprise and go further than most expect.
5. Olivia Lux
Is she our Miss Congeniality? She is mentioned often in both the impressions and naughty/nice video by several queens and is referred to as “glam” by Gottmik in one of them. Olivia seems likely to do well on the runway and could surprise in other areas of the competition as well. I have her going right before the final, setting her up perfectly for Miss Congeniality. Lutz be a lady tonight.
4. Rosè
Did Jan walk so Rose could run? Another member of Jan’s Drag group Stephanie’s Child, we have Rosè this season. She seems a typical modern multi-talented queen with musical ability, performance skills and a modern style. I have her going the distance and can’t wait to see the Jan face crack if Rose does.
3. Denali
She comes across as charming and funny in her meet the queens videos. She isn’t mentioned a ton by the other queens, but we know she can perform and has an interesting viewpoint as an ice skater. Not sure exactly why, but Denali final 4 is my guess and I’m sticking with it.
2. Kandy Muse
Kandy is definitely the most famous queen in this cast. She also is by far the most mentioned queen in the preseason videos. Thus, it seems likely that she will last close to the end. Kandy would be the first “big queen” to win which would be nice. Time will tell, but it would be shocking for her to go before the midpoint.
Winner: Gottmik
She is stunning, the most followed queen on Instagram, and mentioned often by multiple queens in the preseason videos. Gottmik is trans and would also be a clear “first” for the show as a winner. Anything could happen, but Gottmik seems a good bet for the crown this season.
Just between us goyles, what do you think? Keep a bedazzled eye out for my future recaps and 2020 lists, and please have a safe and fabulous new year. Let the music play!
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