She Didn’t Come to Play, She Came to Slay: RuPaul’s Stats Race: All Stars 5, Episode 8

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Queens!  We made it.  And it went down much like we thought and hoped it would all season. Ms. Coulee quite deservingly now has a crown. Such a fun touch that she wore a super similar wig to Sasha for the crowning.

Did I enjoy the song? No. Was the episode boring, given that the result was fairly obvious and the queens maturely resolved all the season’s conflicts quickly? Yes. But overall, I thought this season’s cast was dynamite and provided us with amazing moments. I am glad it popped my full season of blogging cherry.

For those wondering, Shea was not the leader on the chart. All Star 4’s leader on the chart at the finale, Trinity the Tuck, was one of our winners. Chad Michaels and Alaska, the winners from All Stars 1 and 2, were the leaders on the chart. All Stars 3 did not follow this pattern. Trixie Mattel was ahead of Kennedy Davenport once it was down to the final 2,, but it was Shangela and shockingly Bebe Zahara Benet who were tied for the lead going into that last episode.  Below you can find a quick list of who was ahead on the chart and who won the most challenges of our All Stars finalists:

Season 1: Chad Michaels 5, Raven -6, Jujubee -6, Shannel 5 (Chad 3, Raven 0, Jujubee 0, Shannel 3)

Season 2: Alaska 7, Detox 4, Katya 2, Roxxxy Andrews -8 (Alaska 4, Detox 2, Katya 3, Roxxxy 1)

Season 3: Trixie Mattel 1, Kennedy Davenport -6, Shangela 3, Bebe Zahara Benet 3 (Trixie 2, Kennedy 1, Shangela 3, Bebe 2)

Season 4: Trinity the Tuck 7, Monet X Change 1, Monique Heart 3, Naomi Smalls -1 (Trinity 4, Monet 2, Monique 2, Naomi 1)

Season 5: Shea Coulee 4, Jujubee 5, Miz Cracker 6 (Shea 2, Jujubee 1, Miz Cracker 3)

Key:

Green– Lead on the chart

(Green)– Won the most challenges

Red– Did not lead on the chart but won the season

(Red)– Did not win the most challenges but won the season

So Chad, Alaska and Trinity are all winners who led on the chart and won the most challenges. Monet, Trixie and Shea did not. Does this make Shea any less of a deserving or fierce winner in my eyes? No. Stats are fun, but they’re not drag.

So to wrap up this season I thought I’d share my list of my top Ru girls ever. As you can see from the extensive honorably mentioned list, it was terribly difficult to get it down to my top 15, but godamnit I did it. Enjoy!

1. Jujubee (2, All Stars 1, All Stars 5)

This season was such a nice reminder of how exceptionally funny, kind and beautiful she is. A cat lover from Boston (it’s like looking in a mirror for me!) Done- she’s my favorite ever. She is my favorite lip sync-er ever on drag race- she TURNS IT as she showed in the finale’s lip sync.

2. BendelaCreme (6, All Stars 3)

Smart, quirky, curvy, creative and the best Snatch Game-r to ever Snatch. Terminally delightful indeed.

3. Alaska (5, All Stars 2)

My favorite drag musician. So funny with such a unique yet simultaneously classic style. Love her.

4. Shangela (2, 3, All Stars 3)

Fierce, beyond charismatic and one of the best dancers we have ever seen. We’ve watched her grown into a flawless and hilarious entertainer.

5. Bob the Drag Queen (8)

I loved Bob prior to her stint on season 8 and have adored watching her on the Pit Stop and in other videos since her season. So smart, hilarious and a great activist.

6. Katya (7, All Stars 2)

By far my favorite Russian hooker. Katya has the type of humor I love- quirky, dark, weird and wickedly smart.

7. Manila Luzon (3, All Stars 1, All Stars 4)

My favorite fashion queen ever from the show. I find her GORGEOUS and love her campy, and pop cultured influenced takes on outfits. She is also one of my favorite lipsyncers ever.

8. Sasha Valour (9)

I was weary of her initially on Season 9 and thought she might be hipster nonsense. I found out that she is the real deal- beautiful, creative, and a political force. She is an expert at evoking emotion with her drag which I love.

9. Shea Coulee (9, All Stars 5)

What can you say? One of the most beautiful and fierce fashionistas we have ever seen on the show, and I love her political work as well. She’s simply amazing.

10. Tatianna (2, All Stars 2)

I started life as a Bostonian but now am a DC-ist and Tatianna is our god. Moreover, I have loved her ditzy yet fierce persona since season 2. She has grown into a talented and dynamic entertainer- she is another one of my favorite lipsync-ers ever.

11. Jinkx Monsoon (5)

So funny, so smart, so nasty and so talented. She’s wonderful.

12. Asia O’Hara (10)

Funny, creative, shady and beautiful. She is also an amazing and dynamic host. One of my favorite queens from a recent season.

13. Latrice Royale (4, All Stars 1, All Stars 4)

So funny, so talented and so fierce. I was a bit disappointed in her performance, in All Stars 4, but she has beyond redeemed herself for me after with fun appearances on tv along with her hilarious podcast The Chop with Manila.

14. Alexis Mateo (3, All Stars 1, All Stars 5)

What a joy we got to see her again!  She is so endlessly charismatic, fierce on the runway, and an amazing lip syncer.

15. Monet Exchange (10, All Stars 4)

Another one of my favorite lip syncers ever. I also love Monet’s smart and shady sense of humor.

Honorable Mentions:

• Tammie Brown (1, All Stars 1)
• Ongina (1, All Stars 5)
• Jessica Wild (2)
• Carmen Carrera (3)
• Willam (4)
• Alyssa Edwards (5, All Stars 2)
• Ivy Winters (5)
• Vivacious (6)
• April Carrion (6)
• Joslyn Fox (6)
• Trinity K Bonet (6)
• Courtney Act (6)
• Trixie Mattel (7, All Stars 3)
• Chi Chi Devayne (8, All Stars 3)
• Kim Chi (8)
• Valentina (9)
• Nina Bo’Nina Brown (9)
• Kameron Michaels (10)
• Shuga Cain (11)
• Heidi N Closet (11)
• Rock Em Sakura (12)

Alright my friends!  Thank you for sticking with me during this season. In the coming weeks, I will dig into lists about my other dumb pop culture interests (Real Housewives, K Pop, and US pop divas are the current ones dominating my attention) and I will dip into Drag Race Canada from time to time. Until then, always remember the four Hs, and let the music play!